January 2011
105 posts
I hate when someone stays behind me when I'm using...
alwaysmythunder:
I’m like
My Amnesia Girl Banat Compilation
Irene: Oh ulit tayo, review. Sino nga ako kasi?
Apollo: Ikaw si Irene ko. Mapapangasawa ko. Isa kang photographer.
Irene: Eh hindi! Pulis ako.
Apollo: Pulis?
Irene: Kasi ikaw most wanted ko, eh.
Irene: At ikaw naman pintura! Binigyan mo ng kulay ang buhay ko.
Irene: O diksyonaryo, kasi you give meaning to my life.
Apollo: Alarm clock ka ba?
Irene: Bakit?
Apollo: Kasi ginising mo 'yung natutulog kong puso, eh.
Irene: May lason ba 'yung mata mo? Eh kasi... nakakamatay 'yung mga tingin mo, eh.
Apollo: Sandali, alam mo kung cactus ka? Okay lang na masugatan ako, mayakap lang kita.
Irene: Ay teka, ano nga pala blood type mo?
Apollo: Type A, ikaw?
Irene: Type ko... Mahal kita.
Apollo: Sana pirated CD ka na lang, para paulit-ulitin mo 'yan.
Irene: Mahal kita. Mahal kita. Mahal kita. Mahal kasi kita talaga, eh!
Apollo: Bagay sayo suot mo ah. Pero mas bagay ako sayo.
Irene: Hika ka ba? Kasi you take my breath away.
Apollo: Nasan ka ba kagabi?
Irene: Oh, andito lang ako, ah.
Apollo: Ah, kaya pala wala ka sa panaginip ko.
Irene: Alam mo, kung ulan ka, lupa ako. Sa ayaw at sa gusto mo, sa akin ang bagsak mo.
Apollo: Baka ikaw naman 'yung bagyo. Ang lakas kasi ng dating mo, eh.
Irene: Sandali, sandali! May MMDA ba dito?
Apollo: Bakit, bakit?
Irene: Kasi nagkabangaan 'yung puso natin.
Apollo: Pwede! Baka gusto mong kumandidato.
Irene: Bakit?
Apollo: Boto na kasi 'yung tatay ko.
Irene: Ice ka ba?
Apollo: Ayus lang.
Irene: Hindi, ice ka ba?
Apollo: Ano?
Irene: Ano ba, yelo!
Apollo: Bakit?
Irene: Kasi gusto kitang i-crush!
Apollo: Eh ikaw, alak ka ba? Ang lakas kasi ng tama ko sayo eh.
Irene: Eh ikaw ba, Meralco? Kasi maliwanag ang buhay ko kapag kasama kita. Alam mo yan!
Apollo: Pwede ba kitang abutin? Ikaw kasi pangarap ko, eh.
Irene: Ibenta niyo na lang kasi 'yung bahay niyo.
Apollo: Eh bakit?
Irene: Eh kasi libre ka naman tumira sa puso ko.
Apollo: Kung gusto mo, pwede ka maging driver ko.
Irene: Bakit?
Apollo: Para ikaw lang magpapatakbo ng buhay ko.
Irene: Ah gusto mo sasakyan. Eh bakit 'di ka na lang maging magic carpet?
Apollo: Bakit?
Irene: Kasi... you took me to a whole new world! Sobra ka! Hindi ko kaya 'yun. Pero kinaya mo! Bilib ako sayo.
Apollo: Teka, may tanong ako sayo. San mo gusto ikasal?
Irene: Mmm...
Apollo: Ako kasi, sa tabi mo.
Irene: Alam mo ikaw talaga, para kang teleserye.
Apollo: Ako?
Irene: Eh kasi nakakaadik kang subaybayan, eh!
Apollo: Ikaw naman, sine.
Irene: Oh?
Apollo: Ang sarap panoorin.
We're teenagers. We hate school. Our cellphones...
It’s funny how you can always tell when a boy...
An Atheist Professor of Philosophy was speaking to...
Professor: You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Professor: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Professor: My brother died of cancer, even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn’t. How is God good, then? Hmm?
(Student was silent)
Professor: You can’t answer, can you? Let’s start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Professor: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From.. God.
Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student: Yes.
Professor: So who created evil?
(Student didn’t answer)
Professor: Is there sickness? Immortality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, who created them?
(Student had no answer)
Professor: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son.. have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your God.
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God, for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.
Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Professor: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, Science says your God doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor: Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Professor: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as Cold?
Professor: Yes.
Student: No, sir, there isn’t.
(The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of Heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There was a pon-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?
Student: You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light… But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and it’s called Darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, You would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?
Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Professor: If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?
(The class was in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?
(The class broke out into laughter)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? .. No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable and Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures?
(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)
Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student: That is it, sir.. exactly! The link between man and God is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving!
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That student was Albert Einstein.
Brilliant.
Beautifully done.
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wow, this was really albert einstein? had no idea he if believed in anything at all. when stories become about real people don't they hit so much harder?
When you call someone back straight away after...
blowmyspeakersup:
Did your phone suddenly break within that second or something?
THIS.
When the guy you like does something cute and you...
dropdeadope:
cuddlemex:
